Oxymorons

Oxymorons 

 

1.  Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

2.
    Why is the third hand 
On the watch Called the second hand?

3.
  If a word is misspelled 
In the dictionary, How would we ever know?

4.
  If Webster wrote the first dictionary, 
Where did he find the words?

5.
  Why do we say something is out of whack?

What is a whack?

6.   Why does “slow down” and “slow up” mean the same thing?

7.  Why does “fat chance” and “slim chance”
Mean the same thing?

8
.  Why do “tug” boats push their barges?
9.

  Why do we sing “Take me out to the ball game” When we are already there?

10.   Why are they called ” stands” When they are made for sitting?

11.
  Why is it called “after dark” 
When it really is “after light”?

12.
   Doesn’t “expecting the unexpected” 
Make the unexpected expected?

13. 
  Why are a “wise man” and 
A “wise guy” opposites?

14.
 Why do “overlook” and “oversee” 
Mean opposite things?

15.
  Why is “phonics” 
Not spelled The way it sounds?

16.
  If work is so terrific, 
Why do they have to pay you to do it?

17.
   If all the world is a stage, 
Where is the audience sitting?

18.
  If   love is blind, 
Why is lingerie so popular?

19.
  If you are cross-eyed 
And have dyslexia, Can you read all right?

20.
  Why is bra singular 
And panties plural?

21.
  Why do you press harder 
On the buttons of a remote control When you know the batteries are dead?

22.
  Why do we put suits in garment bags 
And garments in a suitcase?

23.
  How come abbreviated 
Is such a long word?

24.
Why do we wash bath towels?  
Aren’t we clean when we use them?

25.
   Why doesn’t glue 
Stick to the inside of the bottle?

26.
  Why do they call it a TV set 
When you only have one?

27.
Christmas  – What other time of the year
Do you sit in front of a dead tree And eat candy out of your socks?  
28.  Why do we drive on a parkway And park on a driveway?  

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