Colonoscopy. . .


Colonoscopies are no joke, but a physician claimed that the following are actual

comments made by his patients (predominately male) while he was performing their colonoscopies:

  • Take it easy Doc. You’re boldly going where no man has gone before.
  • ‘Find Amelia Earhart yet?’
  • ‘Can you hear me NOW?’
  • ‘Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?’
  • ‘You know, in Arkansas, we’re now legally married.’
  • ‘Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?’
  • ‘You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out…’
  • ‘Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!’
  • ‘If your hand doesn’t fit, you must quit!’
  • ‘Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity.’
  • ‘You used to be an executive at Enron, didn’t you?’

And the best one of all:

  • ‘Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?’

  One thought on “Colonoscopy. . .

  1. September 6, 2014 at 9:42 pm

    “Nope, you’re not going to pull a way to pay my bill out of there, doc, I already tried.”

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